It is an honor to be invited to contribute a regular column to Learn2Foster/Learn2Adopt. I hope that over the months ahead I’ll be able to offer insights into the complex emotional issues facing foster children and the adults caring for them. In future columns, we’ll be examining some of the stresses facing foster children and their families—how they are similar to and different from those challenges facing everyone.

First, it is important to think about what we mean by “mental health”. Mental health is sometimes defined as “the absence of a mental disorder,” a definition that seems both too narrow and too negative. I prefer using “mental health” to convey a sense of emotional robustness that persists, even during periods of stress. Emotionally healthy children—and adults—have the capacity to “roll with the punches,” to bounce back from the ups and downs that are an inevitable part of life. While we might wish that every child had an abiding sense of emotional wellbeing and healthy self-esteem, we know that the process of growing up challenges children’s confidence and sense of security. When a best friend moves away or chooses a new “best friend,” or even when learning to throw a ball or ride a bike is harder than expected, children suffer. With the help of parents, teachers, and their peers, most children overcome disappointments and difficulties such as these. We also know that we are all more or less psychologically vulnerable at different times and for different reasons. If a treasured friend moves away around the same time that a close family member becomes seriously ill, we may find it hard to maintain a sense of confidence and optimism. On the flip side, if we have had a series of successes at work or school, we are likely to be able to take a setback in stride.

In addition to the stresses of everyday life, foster children—and their foster and adoptive parents—often face more numerous and difficult challenges than many people encounter in a lifetime. In the weeks and months ahead, send me—you may email or fax—your questions, comments, or suggestions. I'm here to help you help the children in your care.